Gay Married (and a request)
My LGBTQ+ Community of Faith Could Use Your Help
Did I mention I got married? We did! In the photo below are me, the lovely Amanda Lugg (the Mrs.), and Rev. Pat Baumgardner, pastor of MCCNY, on September 19 (for those adding it to your calendar of celebrations).
I’ve been a member of Metropolitan Community Church of New York (MCCNY) since 2006 and a member of the board since 2019. It’s a community that means a lot to me for many reasons. I appreciate the way the sermons revisit and reshape passages of a sacred text that I’ve heard before and transform them into stories of queer liberation, like the one about Ruth and Naomi, that story so often quoted at straight weddings. You know the one, “Wherever you go, I will go; and wherever you stay, I will stay. Your people will be my people, and your God will be my God. Wherever you die, I will die, and there I will be buried.” What MCCNY has helped me see is that this is actually a story of queer liberation and chosen kin. There’s often amazing music there (we are just blocks away from Broadway and sometimes those worlds overlap), and there are lots of beautiful friends, like Toni Boykin, here in her finest Barbie-core. I have yet to see Ms. Boykin repeat an outfit and she is always turned out.
When I first visited MCCNY in 2005 looking for a church home, I sat in one of those gray chairs with my arms-folded across my chest, resisting the idea that there could be a place that aligned with my values. That resistance soon melted when I learned that through MCCNY Charities houses a shelter for LGBTQ+ youth on the first floor, along with a food pantry. Some years after that, they added the Q Clinic, which offers free health care on a walk-in basis. This kind of service is what it means to me to “live according to Gospel mandates.” And, on our wedding day, it was two people who work in the shelter who served as our witnesses.
The shelter exists because it was a final request of Stonewall veteran, Puerto Rican icon, and trans activist, Sylvia Rivera, who was an active member of MCCNY. She spoke to Rev. Pat in 2002, just before she died to ask (demand really), that the church set up a shelter for homeless queer youth. Sylvia herself spent much of her life living unhoused along the peers on the west side of Manhattan and establishing the shelter was her way of taking care of her kids, the queer youth that she knew would follow after her, and need housing, food, and health care. The shelter, Sylvia’s Place, is named in her honor, as is the pantry. Sylvia’s ashes rest on the altar at the church.
Since the pandemic, MCCNY has struggled to find our footing again. This year, 2024, has proven to be a particularly tough one, an annus horribilis if you will. As a board member, I get to sit in on those meetings about fun things like budgets, and we are looking at a $150,000 deficit at the end of this year. So, here is my ask: If you can spare any coins, or the whole thing (I know this is true of someone reading this!), I’d be most grateful for your contributions to this GoFundMe I’ve set up to help us close that gap. If you’re not able to donate right now, please share with someone who might be.
Whatever is ahead in 2025 and beyond, there are going to be a lot of people who need our help, especially the most vulnerable among us. We’ll get through this with kindness, solidarity, and mutual aid.
Peace.